If you read internet message boards, and gossip rags, you'll notice that the world is full of meanies. Everytime someone criticizes an actress/singer/model, fangirls and boys always jump to their defense by saying, "you're just jealous." While I maintain that I have the right to think that certain people are simply annoying (ahem Anne Hathaway), I know that there is some truth to this jab.
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In Death Becomes Her, Goldie and Meryl take their
jealousy to the afterlife. |
There's a reason that envy is one of the Seven Deadly Sins. There is a reason that people consumed with jealousy are referred to as, "green eyed monsters." And yes, there is a reason that nobody wants to be in a relationship with a person who is jealous. Jealousy often goes hand in hand with insecurity, and it can make you do terrible things. Like trash talk people that you don't even know, stalk your ex boyfriend over the internet and even hurt people if you really have a screw loose.
That said, a small amount of jealousy can be good. If your friend is dating a great guy, you can use your jealousy as a signal to chuck the loser that borrows your car every weekend and find someone who treats you better. But extreme jealousy is unhealthy and can impede your ability to live a normal life. If you're always focused on people who have things that you want, you fail to take notice of the things that you have.
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| Single White Female - The ultimate cautionary tale |
As a person who has experienced my fair share of envy, I can say that although it is a hard habit to break, life is better when you don't compare yourself to other people. Jealousy can make you do and say horrible things, and in the end, it's really a waste of time and energy.
So how do you get over it? Well, for one thing, cut yourself some slack. Everyone gets a different path to walk through on life. Just because someone has something you think you want doesn't mean that they get to be free from problems. Remember that people show what they want to the outside world, but there's often a lot underneath the surface that you don't get to see. That girl who you just trashed on the intenet message board just because she's married to "your" Hollywood hearthrob? How would you feel if that was your husband and people were constantly saying those things about you? It isn't a life that I would want to live. (Mea Culpa Anne Hathaway.)
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Single White Female - Remixed and Remastered
(The Roommate) |
Also, take stock of the things that make you unique. What can you do that nobody else can do? Take those skills and develop those. Know how to make a killer batch of brownies? Take a baking class and learn how to make other things. So what if that greasy haired beyotch is now dating the love of your life. If he was really the love of your life, he'd still be with you. And you're too busy creating your pastry chef empire to notice.
It's human nature to be jealous every once in awhile, but it's not okay to let it control your life. So quit being so obsessed with the lives of others, and go get one! You'll be happy that you did.
